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More Practices of Effective Small Group Leaders
By Paul | December 5, 2007
Follow these practical steps to get your group started in the right direction - 1 Timothy 4:12
Be Flexible with Your Curriculum
When using a pre-packed study, read ahead one session or chapter and see if you can reduce the amount of material covered by half. This will help the group feel more focused and less rushed, which actually boosts the overall participation.
Remember that some questions and exercises will work for one group of people, but not for another. You will learn what your group connects with best over time. By tailoring the study plan, discussions will feel more lively, natural, and relevant for everyone.
Be Flexible with Your Agenda
Don’t get locked in to a regimented schedule for your group’s gatherings. There will be times when the group tracks with what you anticipated and planned to cover. There will be other times when it does not. Community-building is not an orderly, mechanistic process—so be flexible. Prioritize the principle of staying “on-track” behind the personal needs that arise in the group.
For example, when someone shares a difficult situation or problem that they are dealing with, make time to pray for that person as a group. Stop what you are doing and care for him or her instead of pressing forward to complete all the questions for that session.
Listen Well
Oftentimes, people concentrate so much on what they think about a statement, or what they want to say in response to that statement, that they really don’t hear what the other person is actually saying. This lack of listening can be devastating to a group’s mutual trust. So be sure to establish the principle of “hearing one another” as an expression of “loving one another.”
Do this by encouraging group participants not to interrupt when another person is speaking, or to be too quick in offering advice that will “solve” the person’s problems. In addition, pat answers—“all things work together for good”—or attempts to “fix” the person speaking both end only in frustration.
Finally, don’t just sympathize—empathize. It’s easy to listen when a person is speaking. But it’s entirely a different thing to put yourself in that person’s shoes and compassionately enter his or her story. As a leader, taking the time to empathize with your group members shows that you understand and care for them.
Care for Your Members
Display a genuine care for your group participants, and do so both inside and outside of meetings. Be available to your group as needs arise, and make sure that each person knows you are available. Remember that some of the best moments of relationship building occur outside of scheduled meeting times—connection “outside” fuels connection “inside.”
Be Accountable to Your Members
Last by not least, lead participants to a place where they can find the courage to confess their sins to each another and experience the healing God wants to bring (James 5:16). Doing so prevents sin from festering inside of your members and promotes wholeness. Dietrich Bonhoeffer’s words reveal the importance of practicing confession in your small group:
In confession the breakthrough to community takes place. Sin demands to have a man by himself. It withdraws him from the community. The more isolated a person is, the more destructive will be the power of sin over him. And the more deeply he becomes involved in it, the more disastrous is his isolation.
Sin wants to remain unknown. It shuns the light. In the darkness of the unexpressed, it poisons the whole being of a person…. In confession, the light of the Gospel breaks into the darkness and seclusion of the heart. The sin must be brought into the light.
As the leader, you can take the first steps in this process by sharing doubts you have faced, principles God has taught you through weakness, and personal struggles in applying God’s Word and living a life of faith. Don’t worry about being on an island for long—everyone will quickly relate to your experiences and find more freedom in their own confession as a result.
Topics: Instruct |
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